Any material items you buy are just going to become somebody else’s headache and heartache one day. What do people do with all the shirts left hanging? Each one a reminder of a moment gone, a moment that instantly becomes precious and you think, “Why didn’t I pay closer attention to every detail that night? Did we only talk about the dog the whole time? What music was playing?”… I don’t remember. What do I do with all these shirts now?

Material items are not what I want to collect. Sure I need a new pair of boots and well the Gorman dress wasssss on sale, but my ultimate treasures are interactions. With great loss can come greater awareness of what matters most. People. People and relationships.

So when invited to join my mum, aunties nanna, sister and cousins on a trip to Malta, I knew that the new TV could wait.

Priceless was the moment that Hayley, Grace and Steph sat shell shocked in the taxi as we drove to our apartment in Sliema. “It’s ummm different to what I imagined”. And then the relief when our apartment was beach front and close to the familiarities of home: a coffee shop, a supermarket, a Zara.

I couldn’t put a price on the moment we visited my Nanna’s 92 year old sister, Bice. How thankful she was to have a room full of family and how the tears flowed as she reminded us that, “Nobody can teach you love”, and how lucky we are to be together. Realisation that it was probably the last time Nanna and her would see each other.

A guided tour by Nanna of her old home, my Nannu’s home, the church they were married in, the grave her brother was buried. Even the constant complaining of how goddam hot it was has been stored and treasured.

Sure, seven people coming home after a day of eating pastizzis at the beach, each dying for a shower, had its downsides. “Hayley are you still in there? Hurry up.” Or – “What do you mean you didn’t turn the air conditioner off all day and now we have used all of our allocated power?” “Can we steal these napkins, we’re out of toilet paper… again.”

But it was the moments with these people, my family, that were my highlights. From cruising in a private yaght, to laughing unconditionally as Hayley impersonated a cat’s meow and had strollers by searching aimlessly under cars for the lost feline, I knew I had spent my money wisely. I enjoyed watching Steph and Dale dote over their rapidly growing baby bump, Grace hit peak rage at someone at 9.30 each night, and watching my mum and sister sit on a balcony drinking Cisk (is Mum relaxing yet?). My Aunty Liz and Aunty Sunny floating in the blue lagoon while we stood aboard the boat trying to swat away the approaching jelly fish (which later chased me and got me good in Italy). Catching ferries into Valletta and watching the nightly fireworks.

One day, my Nanna took Mel and I to her favourite beach spot as a child, and she still managed to look better in a bathing suit than any of us. I will remember this moment forever. I pay such close attention to everything now. I will remember the way she spoke of her time as a child and I will remember the way she smiled…

But when my time comes, I won’t remember how many shirts were hanging in my wardrobe…

And a small stay in Sicily and Barcelona 💕